Writings on the wall: a page of my old diary

Writings on the wall: a page of my old diary-
June 1987 Geneva - Switzerland :


...I don't fear being called insane. When I am alone, I dare myself to speak out loud. Someone, once, taught me that it is the best way to communicate with the unknown, and I am after such a contact. I know the road ahead for me is hard and harsh, and if I don't find words to speak out, I might then, just like others, mumble the nonsense alien phrases I don't even fully understand. I have heard and felt the difference in the tone of my voice, but that is proof for me that I am walking on the right path. I have chosen my path. Therefor, every turn of the road I encounter, I welcome and appreciate, because I honestly feel myself apart of life on earth, apart of rivers and mountains; I see myself in every bird, tree and living being. I am a part of existence. So, I lead the way that life has predicted for me. Some nights, I don't find a bed to sleep on, and others, sleep don't come to my eyes. But I always tell myself:" this is the road that I have chosen, and this is a part of my voyage too". In this way, I regain my strength. I have chosen my path, and whatever I encounter on the way, leaves me no complain. I am confident and proud of my choice, and therefor feel no desire to reject the path others have chosen. This gives me strength, and helps me acknowledge my weaknesses.

My companions complain that "I am a dreamer", or that " I am wasting my time". Well, they might be right, but I do not allow their belief to stop my walk onward the path I have chosen. It is a long time since I have learned not to live my life playing the role others have chosen for me. I have passed the path that I had to pass, and I don't complain of difficulties that continue to bug me.The difficulty on the path I have chosen will precisely lead me to the final destination I dream to reach.

I have learned from the stars that their inner explosion is the reason for their shine...